We never know….

We never know….

An adult Taekwondo student of mine recently shared a picture of a special space in her life. This is a space that provides rest, insight, meditation, peace and opportunity. She uses this space on a daily basis and relies on the light, accoutrements, atmosphere and layout to provide what her mind, spirit and soul require to help her thrive.

Within that picture I saw something that touched me. It was a display of the colour belts she has achieved through her Taekwondo practise, attached, in order, on the wall and the last one on an alter facing the window. When I asked, she replied “I hung them there as reminders of how far I’ve come. It helps on the days when I’m heavy with self-doubt”. This wonderfully powerful woman will be testing side by side with her son next May for their Taekwondo Black Belts.

Several years ago I got a call from a parent asking about having her daughter switch from a martial arts school where she was struggling, to mine. We discussed the program and the young woman began her practise a week later. Over time the mom and I have chatted about how she’s doing in the program and I get updates about how she is thriving in school, her self-confidence is higher than it’s ever been and she is a happy, busy, focused and well rounding individual. Undervalued, under appreciated and discouraged as she was when she arrived, this amazing young person will be testing for her Taekwondo Black Belt in May of 2027.

A few months ago I got a note from a parent about an incident her son had at school, and she really needed me to know about it. This is a mother / son team who trains together at the club and have now for three years. The boy, aged about 10, is ripe for bullying with his thick glasses, petite size and long hair. (Having been bullied as a kid I know full well what bullies are looking for in their victims)

The story I got was that he was approached by a bigger kid who poked him in the arm with the intent of provoking a fear response. According to mom he slowly turned to look the bigger boy in the eye. No fear, no words, no sign on his face but no mistaking there was to be no more of that behaviour. The bully backed off and went seeking easier pickings. This fearless young man and his mother will be testing together for their Black Belts next May.

These are three of the stories that, had I not asked or specifically been told, describe the hidden effects that someone can have on the lives of those we touch. I teach Taekwondo because I love the martial art and I love to teach, not because what I do will have an effect outside the dojang.

There are innumerable lessons buried in the techniques and philosophies that Taekwondo (and other martial arts) present, and we never know how those lessons may be interpreted or utilized by our students. After more than 23 years of teaching, hundreds of students and thousands of hours of mat time I have heard from very few about how they have been touched by what the club community and I offer.

What’s important here is that we all, student or Instructor, White Belt or Black, young and old, have the opportunity to instill a positive effect on the lives of those under our tutelage. Just because we never hear what that outcome may be, does not make the effect any less important.